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This long weekend, I made the plan to visit my brother who I haven’t seen in a while. I was determined to make plans, but, just for myself. No catching up with old friends, no dinners or coffees which at times feels like too much, of course leaving some gap to spend some time with my brother. I wanted to spend time with myself being outside. I hadn’t done that in a while and I thought this weekend could be all about that. I wandered through a farm that was filled with just ki

Every year I travel 23 hours to see the two most important people in my life; my grandfather and my grandmother. Some of my earliest memories are filled with them, and no one could ever replace the love I have for them. I grew up in their presence, summers spent running around their house, falling asleep to my grandfather’s lullaby, waking up to grandmother’s hot milk. But as I’m growing up, I realized they are too. But, just growing old instead. There are some truths in life

When I was eight, I couldn’t wait to grow up. I dreamed of independence, a place of my own, the freedom to come and go as I pleased, no one asking where I was or when I’d be back. I wanted a life that was fully mine. But what no one tells you about growing up is that sometimes the people you love don’t leave all at once, they just quietly drift to the edges of your life. Not with a bang, but with a soft fade. A couple of weeks ago, I was sitting with a friend and had the idea

When I was taking a break from studying at the library in University, I remember putting on this YouTube video, ‘ A Quiet evening in the South Of France’. There wasn’t any background music. Sunlight peaking through the window, you could hear the gentle rustle of curtains swaying from the wind, birds chirping. No narration. No background music, just pure stillness. It felt like a world I didn’t live in. I remember thinking it was more like a lifestyle I wanted to have, but cou

Last week, I broke down in front of my therapist. I was doing an exercise with her where she told me to put my hands where I felt the most stressed and told me to imagine what I was feeling like this big cartoon character. What came to mind wasn’t anything playful or funny. It was a big shadow. It's looming, dark, and formless, the kind that fills so much room you forget there was ever any light in the first place. What I was feeling, I called it loneliness . When I was a kid

Me and my friend sat outside on the balcony, admiring the skyline of the city aft er along day of being outside. Maybe it’s because I see the same view every day, but to me, it wasn’t particularly fascinating.I think familiarity has a way of making beautiful things feel ordinary. But then he turned to me and said something I’ve been thinking about every since: "You’ve got to appreciate this. You might never get it back.” He laughed at me right after he said that, because I lo

There are certain things in life you never really notice until you’re forced to sit still, without noise, without hurry , and simply watch. That morning, it was me, outside my grandfather’s front porch at 6 a.m., a mug of fresh coffee and my dog leaping into my lap as I absentmindedly rubbed his head. My eyes fell on the big mango tree, its branches stretching across the roof, the same tree that has stood there for as long as I can remember. So ordinary I’d almost forgotten i

I’ve always had a complicated relationship with September. It just sort of creeps in in a subtle kind of way. To me, it has always been the month of transitions. It feels more like a new year to me than January ever could. The air changes, carries this quiet crispness that makes you want to breathe deeper. It’s when I tuck away my dresses, when my slides are replaced by sneakers, when iced coffees turn into warm cups full of fall drinks. It’s subtle, but it feels like the sta